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my gripe is that i didnt know they were taking it out which is my fault but i didnt have the option of cashing the policy in and now my cash value is gone
Before a policy starts to do that, they send letters informing you of the premium needed to sustain the policy. If it is to the point of a significant loss of cash value, they would have sent multiple letters by this point. Policies that are to that point usually get a letter every year telling them the estimated lapse date based on current premium. You probably thought they were normal statements and didnt really look at all of what they sent.
You can most likely see recent correspondence from the carrier going back at least a year or two on their website. Im pretty sure every state has laws regarding this issue. If they did not send any letters, then you certainly would have a valid complaint to file against them.