I'm not sure your question has anything to do with them being the same sex. I have never heard of an insurance company insuring two people, same sex or not, who aren't married.
When Jacqueline and I were living together I could not get on her group plan. After we got married it wasn't a problem.
I would think that any insurance company would insure a married couple and their children regardless of the sex. (There is no logical reason that sex should enter into it.) It may be one of those things where you fill out the app and send it in to see what happens.
The question becomes, can an insurance company refuse coverage to a married couple regardless of sex? I personally don't think they should be able to deny coverage.
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Yes, even if legally married I don't have a carrier who will underwrite them. In fact, most software don't allow same sex quotes for primary applicants.
Check with your carriers. In California, used to be DPs same sex any age as long as they were registered as DPs. This has changed at Blue Cross CA and now they will allow both same- and opposite-sex DPs 18 and up.
I actually don't see the issue except for possibly not getting a family discount, however there's never discounts for just two applicants, normally 4 applicants have to be on the plan.
Aside from that I can have my own plan and my wife can have her own and it's neither here nor there.
What the gay community has been fighting for is the ability to make medical decisions regarding pulling the plug or organ donation.
Several states have laws that require insurance companies to offer benefits to domestic partnerships. I recall that there was a court case, maybe in CT, where a gay couple sued to get benefits under this provision. I will try to find the case later. In addition, large groups can usually decide on their own if they want to allow benefits to domestic partners, and that will usually include gay couples.
As far as children go, gay men or women can adopt children legally. Once an adoption is finished, the children would be entitled to benefits like any natural child would.